God’s Grace

Indulge me while I pour out my heart. I am a Type 1 diabetic. I was diagnosed at age 12. While some of you who have known me for years know this, other sweet readers do not. It affects my life daily. I am completely dependent on insulin shots –six a day to be exact. For this very reason, my OB/GYN told me last December I needed to decide whether or not to have any more children. I already had two healthy children through two healthy pregnancies.  But in April, I turned 35. It was the cut-off. 

Anyone on the birth control pill after the age of 35 has a greater risk of stroke.  Any diabetic on the birth control pill after the age of 35 – well, let’s just say the doctor told me that was not an option. I needed to choose a more permanent form of birth control. For a woman, that is a big decision. My husband and I discussed it at length. In January, we decided we were happy with the two blessings we have and would call it quits. 

But because I try – let me emphasize try – to be obedient to God in all areas, I took it to the Lord in prayer.  While standing in the mirror putting on make-up one morning, I said a prayer something like this:

Lord, Alan and I have decided we are done having children. You have given us two healthy children. But if YOU want me to have another child, I will.  But it will have to come from you because I’m doing all I can to prevent that from happening. (Translation – I was on the pill.)Amen.

Exactly five weeks later, I found out I was pregnant.  I got God’s answer – loud and clear. To the Christian, these events are not mere coincidence. These details were the culmination of the powerful hand of Our God – the God that can do anything. While this was exciting, it was also scary. My blood sugars have to be perfect during pregnancy, or I risk hurting the baby.

However, since that time, my diabetic doctor has been calling me asking how I’m keeping my levels so perfect. My answer – when God plans for something, He provides all the details.

This past Tuesday, we had a high-level ultrasound to check for any abnormalities in the baby. It will be no surprise to you that this child is perfect.  SHE is a perfect example of God’s handiwork.  Yes, we also found out we are having a girl. 

We’ve been struggling with a name. We want one that honors Him. This morning during my quiet time, I was flipping through my journal. I often write down verses that God has given me during our time together and write my thoughts. I’d like to share one I found.

February 13, 2009

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV

Lord,

            I’m trusting in your plan. Wednesday, I found out that I’m pregnant. No surprise to you but great surprise to me. Lord, I didn’t think that was the plan, but not my will but Thine. I feel like my writing will suffer with the birth of a child. With Faith headed to Kindergarten, I thought I would be spending my time writing. It looks as if I’ll be taking care of a baby. Lord, a baby is such a blessing, and we are honored you’ve blessed us.  But we are in a little shock.

I know you told me to abide in you and this would be a fruitful year. I still feel that you mean that in regards to my writing – especially after reading this verse this morning. Where I think having a baby will make me weaker in the area of writing, Your power will be made perfect.

Lord, I commit this pregnancy to you.  Keep this baby safe and healthy. Help me to get my blood sugars under control. Please let this one come on its on and not have to be induced – but not too early. Please give us a name for this blessing. Thank you for increasing us. Continue to use me. Amen.

As I finished reading, tears came to my eyes. I knew we had the perfect name – Grace.  And on her wall, I will frame that verse.

What a mighty God we serve. Can I humbly ask for your prayers as I continue to carry the Grace God has given me?  I love you all.